poem: maintaining the dosage

Inching towards a new knowingness

I reel at nothing, glance only once 

figure out my tangled anxieties like a knot, hot, red iron faults.

I eat faster to get to the next thing, next thing, the next thing

pushing through like a baby, light crack, scream

Restless body but a
brave new mind, 

The sky is still blue, purple, pink

River running, still running

I could blame it on their syringe, I can blame myself

I could eat guilt faster, next thing, next thing, next thing.